2 Reasons Why Anxiety Pops Up Out of Nowhere

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My Darling Subscribers,

I have the privilege of moderating a private, psycho-educational Facebook group of over 800 individuals who authentically show up every day to share their stories, provide support and feedback to each other, and ask GREAT questions.

I have recently committed myself to showing up every day in the group, for 30 days, to provide a live stream video to either address member questions, or share new information on something that interests me.

Two questions popped up recently and I thought they were good questions, so I wanted to share my response with you.

  1. What are some clinical book recommendations on attachment theory?
  2. Why does anxiety pop up out of nowhere?

For a quick overview, my favorite CLINICAL books include…

  • Attachment Psychotherapy by David Wallin
  • Trauma and the Avoidant Client by Robert Muller
  • Interdependent Minds, by Murray and Holmes (no attachment theory specific, but a good read for couples struggling with such issues)

With respect to the question, why does anxiety pop up out of nowhere?

I chose to discuss this primarily from a psycho-spiritual perspective.

And it revolves around two things:

  1. The body being the first organizer of experience
  2. The role of the transcendental self

I invite you to watch the video above to get the full explanation.

Please leave me your questions and comments below and we can answer them too!

If you would like to join our private group, you can do so HERE.

Be sure to subscribe if you want more content like this in your feed 🙂

Warmest regards,

Hope to see you there!

Warmest regards,

Briana MacWilliam

TheAbundantHealer.net
CreativeArtsTherapiesOnline.com
BrianaMacWilliam.com

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(Day 2 of 3) The Cure For Procrastination: Bite-Sized Portions

maxresdefaultResearch that claims three things can improve your situation, if you are a chronic procrastinator…

  • Forgiving yourself.
  • Breaking your tasks up into bite-sized portions.
  • Treating work like play.

Yesterday, we explored the evidence supporting forgiving yourself, as a way to overcome chronic procrastination. If you missed it, you can catch it here, on my blog.

Today, I would like to take a closer look at ‘Breaking your tasks up into bite-sized portions.’

pushing-task-boulder-over-procrastination-hump

Cuz Breaking Up is Hard to Do…

It used to be that psychologists thought people who procrastinate have a faulty sense of time, but recent research suggests procrastination is linked to emotional regulation.

There’s no single type of procrastinator, but several general impressions have emerged over years of research.

Chronic procrastinators have perpetual problems finishing tasks, while situational ones delay based on the task itself;  that is, when people view a task in an unpleasant manner (“It will be tough, boring, painful…”), they are more likely to put it off.

A perfect storm of procrastination occurs when an unpleasant task meets a person who’s high in impulsivity and low in self-discipline.

One of the things we talked about yesterday is the tendency of the procrastinator to seek short-term escapes to relieve feelings of tension, stress, shame, guilty and so on, but this hinders the procrastinator’s ability to absorb any meaningful insight or lessons from sitting with the tension.

Sirois and Pychyl propose the idea that procrastinators comfort themselves in the present with the false belief that they’ll be more emotionally equipped to handle a task in the future.

Sirois believes the best way to eliminate the need for short-term mood fixes is to find something positive or worthwhile about the task itself, and to break it up into smaller tasks that are manageable and more achievable.

How do you do that?

In addition to breaking up a big task in to bite-sized portions,
here’s a summary of 4 of Dr. Lombardo‘s suggestions…

1. Stop catastrophizing. One of the biggest reasons people procrastinate is because they catastrophize, or make a huge deal out of something.

2. Focus on the benefits, and why its meaningful to you. If you’ve been putting off cleaning out a closet, imagine walking into the closet when it is decluttered and how good that will feel.

3. Set realistic deadlines. You need to schedule when you are going to work on a project and block out that time, just as you would an important meeting. And be realistic about your routines; if you know you’re a night owl don’t plan to get up an hour early to start that new exercise routine–you’ll be setting yourself up to fail.

4. Optimize your environment. Your environment can help or hinder your productivity. During your scheduled block of time for working on a particular task, close your email and IM, turn off your phone.

So as you creep towards 2018  and start to consider those oh-so-important New Year’s resolutions, consider these tips to help you stay on track!

And make sure you check your email, or back here tomorrow, for when we explore how treating work like play, can cure procrastination as well.

Furthermore, I encourage you to check out the amazing discounted offers and FREE trainings I have below, to help expand your horizons and make AMAZING and GROUNDBREAKING changes in your life, in 2018.

As always feel free to replay with questions, comments, concerns, and high fives!

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

Hope to see you there!

Warmest regards,

Briana MacWilliam

TheAbundantHealer.net
CreativeArtsTherapiesOnline.com
BrianaMacWilliam.com

P.S. JOIN OUR PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP!

(DAY 1 OF 3) The Cure for Procrastination: Forgiving Yourself

Dearest Subscriber,

First of all, greetings during the holiday season!

I hope you are finding ways to stay warm and take stock, whether its with family and friends, or taking time out to hibernate and rejuvenate in solitude.

I tend to do a little bit of both.

Here’s a picture of me and my third day in this sweat shirt, trying to figure out holiday filters and not succeeding very well  (obviously).

Here’s a picture of me and my sister on Christmas Eve, when I bothered to shower and actually had a great time going out to dinner and singing Karaoke, until I lost my voice (I do a mean Janis Joplin, “Piece of My Heart.”)

And this is a picture of my son, who called me on Christmas day to show me his fangs and tell me how much fun he was having at Disney World with his Papi.

Today, I’d like to share what I have learned about one thing that seems to plague people when it comes to this time of year, when we take stock of what we’ve done, and start turning towards what we want to accomplish…

Procrastination!

As 2017 winds down, I find myself reflecting on my resolutions from last year, and what I aim to accomplish in the next year.

And a few things have popped up for me, when it comes to the reasons why we do or do not accomplish the things we set out to, at the beginning of every year.

In a previous post, I mentioned that there are two things that can get us into trouble when it comes to following through on our goals and resolutions, and those are…

1. Dreaming Big
2. Procrastination

If you missed it, you can check it out here, on my blog, to learn more about how dreaming big can trip you up.

Today, I intend to make good on my promise to follow up with evidenced-based research that claims three things can improve your situation, if you are a chronic procrastinator…

  • Forgiving yourself.
  • Breaking your tasks up into bite-sized portions.
  • Treating work like play.

Over the next three days, I would like to take a closer look at all three of these.

Today, let’s start with ‘forgiving yourself.’

Forgiving Yourself

Researchers and psychologists define procrastination as the voluntary delay of some important task that we intend to do, despite knowing that we’ll suffer as a result. And an inability to manage emotions seems to be its very foundation.

“While everybody may procrastinate, not everyone is a procrastinator,” says APS Fellow Joseph Ferrari, “to tell the chronic procrastinator to just do it would be like saying to a clinically depressed person, ‘cheer up’.”

Sympathizers of procrastination often say it doesn’t matter when a task gets done, so long as it’s eventually finished. Some even believe they work best under pressure.

But one study published in Psychological Science back in 1997 revealed the costs of procrastination far outweighed the temporary benefits. Procrastinators reported higher cumulative amounts of stress and illness.

True procrastinators didn’t just finish their work later — the quality of it suffered, as did their own well-being.

Why would procrastinators put themselves through that?

“The chronic procrastinator, the person who does this as a lifestyle, would rather have other people think that they lack effort than lacking ability,” says Ferrari.

In other words, procrastinators would rather be thought of as lazy, than incapable.

To my mind, this is actually perfectionism and fear of failure, which is ALL underscored by a deep-seeded sense of shame; a feeling which procrastinators are notorious for avoiding, by seeking out short-term escapes from the consequences of their actions (or inaction).

For example, a group of students were told a woman went on vacation and didn’t use sunscreen. When she came home she had a suspicious mole, but delayed in going to the doctor.

Procrastinators are likely to say things like, “Well at least she caught it before it got worse.” This statment releases the tension of the moment, opting for a rationalization that offers some mental and emotional relief.

Whereas non-procrastinators say things like, “She should have gone to the doctor sooner.” This statment takes in the tension of the moment, and makes it an applicable lesson; insight is derived from the discomfort.

So what is the solution for procrastinators?

Forgiveness and self-compassion.

A research team, led by Michael Wohl, reported in a 2010 issue of Personality and Individual Differences that students who forgave themselves after procrastinating on the first exam were less likely to delay studying for the second one.

They believe that procrastination is really a self-inflicted wound that gradually chips away at the most valuable resource in the world: time.

“It’s an existentially relevant problem, because it’s not getting on with life itself,” Whol says. “You only get a certain number of years. What are you doing?”

Amen!

This is  YOUR LIFE.

This is YOUR STORY.

No one is going to write it but YOU.
Make sure you check your email tomorrow, or come back here, for when we explore how to break down tasks into bite-sized portions, in order to make them more digestible.

And in the spirit of seizing the day, I encourage you to check out the amazing discounted offers and FREE trainings I have below, to help expand your horizons and make AMAZING and GROUNDBREAKING changes in your life, in 2018.

As always feel free to replay with questions, comments, concerns, and high fives!

 

These AMAZING trainings that are still available to you for our open enrollment period, December 1rd, 2017 to January 3rd, 2018.

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

Hope to see you there!

Warmest regards,

Briana MacWilliam

TheAbundantHealer.net
CreativeArtsTherapiesOnline.com
BrianaMacWilliam.com

P.S. JOIN OUR PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP!

New Year’s Resolutions…Why Aren’t They Resolved Already?

When it comes to New Year’s resolutions, we have this tendency to set BIG, lofty goals for ourselves…things we couldn’t POSSIBLY complete, even in a year’s time.

Either because they are too many, too much, in too short of a time, or because they tackle aspects of our mental end emotional selves that we aren’t ACTUALLY ready to face, or lack the tools to address CONSISTENTLY.

I have found two things tend to impact our ability to follow through with our goals and/or resolutions, and that is…

1. Procrastination
2. Dreaming Big

1. Procrastination.

Researchers have found TRUE procrastinators actually struggle with emotional regulation, not their priorities; they feel shameful about a fear of not succeeding, and would rather appear lazy, than incapable.

The solution?

  • Forgiving yourself.
  • Breaking your tasks up into bite-sized portions.
  • Treating work like play.

(Stay tuned for my next post where I back this up with evidenced-based research!)

2. Dreaming Big.

Dreamers have a tendency to get lost in fantasy (which is also a trait of true procrastinators) who are GREAT at visualizing the big picture, but NOT so great at visualizing each step it would take to climb that glorious mountain.

The solution is to visualize yourself CONSISTENTLY doing SMALL action steps that lead up to that pinnacle point.  And then DECIDE and COMMIT not just to the dream, but the itty bitty steps.

Now,  my private Facebook community of 380 therapists and healers, is for DREAMERS who are DONE procrastinating, and willing to learn the necessary steps to climbing their own personal Mt. Everest.

In this group, we support each other and uplift one another with a resounding…

“YOU CAN DO IT!”

Right after our last Facebook ads training, our abundant healer, Kristen Boyer, managed to attract over 100 clients to her private Facebook group, in only 10 days. 

Here is a bit of her journey in the program, and how she is experiencing this new influx for her practice…

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What would you do with 100 new, potential clients in only 10 days?


THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS!

  • Why do you keep yourself small?
  • Why do you keep telling yourself “I’ll do it tomorrow?”
  • Why do you keep insisting that you don’t DESERVE it?
  • Why do you have to be an “expert” to explore and share what only YOU can personally know, in your experience?


How long are you going to let all the rich material and content that you are just SITTING ON , collect dust?

When is it going to be time to STEP INTO YOUR POWER and your SOUL ASSIGNMENT?

When are you going to LET GO of your scarcity attitudes around money, and realize you have to spend it, to make it?

Who better to invest in you, than YOU???!!!!

Forget 2017.

Seriously.

“So long, 2017, and don’t let the door hit you on the way out!”

Time to STOP focusing on the negative.
Time to STOP REPELLING your abundances with anxiety, fear, and doomsday predictions.

This is  YOUR LIFE.

This is YOUR STORY.

No one is going to write it but YOU.

And the best way to take one small step towards BEST SELLING AUTHORSHIP, is to book a free consultation with ME!

Which you can do here.

This is a FREE business coaching session in which we take a look at your business and devise a plan of approach that might have you collecting $9000 in revenue per month…like me 🙂

Alternatively, check out these AMAZING trainings that are still available to you for our open enrollment period, December 1rd, 2017 to January 3rd, 2018.

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

REGISTER FOR THIS FREE TRAINING

Hope to see you there!

Warmest regards,

Briana MacWilliam

TheAbundantHealer.net
CreativeArtsTherapiesOnline.com
BrianaMacWilliam.com

P.S. JOIN OUR PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP!

[Guided Meditation: Learn to Receive] Releasing Shame, Guilt & Fucked Up Stories

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Dearest Subscriber,
A couple of our new private Facebook group members, for THE ABUNDANT HEALER: 90 DAYS TO SKYROCKET YOUR CAREER signature program, reported for the initial intake questions…
 
“I just started my journey as a therapist and I feel I block abundance by not believing I can have it…I would like to learn how to allow myself to receive.”
 
“Sometimes I feel guilty charging for something I am naturally gifted in.”
 
And I felt that was SO P0WERFUL and ON POINT when it comes to the MAJOR blocks people have to abundance.
 
There are A LOT of stories we tell ourselves, about why we can or cannot have something.
 
And many of them get wrapped up int two things, in my observation…
 
1. What we think about our own deservedness
2. And what we think other people think about our own deservedness.
 
And as therapists and healers we have this propensity to get caught up in the idea that “being of service” means we have to sacrifice our quality of life to be “good servants.”
 
But the problem is, that keeps you small.
It keeps you begging after guilt.
It keeps you bent over shame’s knee.
 
And I guarantee you, whatever esoteric source of infinite energy and intelligence you believe in, is NOT served best by you begging and bent over anyone’s punitive ideas about right and wrong, good and bad, or what you are and are not deserving of receiving.
 
If you learn nothing else from this post, remember these three points I would like to DRILL into your brain and heart…
 
1. STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHER PEOPLE AND THEIR STORIES, WHETHER THEY ARE FORTUNATE OR UNFORTUNATE!
2. YOU DON’T OWE ANYONE ANYTHING!
3. NO ONE ELSE OWE’S YOU ANYTHING!
 
…Outside of respect and basic human decency in our social contracts. And if you accept this, you have to accept two more things…
 
1. YOU ALONE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR CHOICES.
2. OTHER PEOPLE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIRS.
 
We have built these physical and psychic webs of guilt and shame and obligatory responsibility around social and cultural constructions that have infiltrated our subjective experiences to the point of self sabotage and abandonment.
 
And so, we are left with a scarcity mindset, because as is within, so is without, and when you waste time scrambling around to prove yourself worthy to people, you leave your home base unguarded, unfortified, and vulnerable to attack.
 
STOP ASKING FOR PERMISSION TO LIVE YOUR LIFE THE WAY YOU WERE MEANT TO LIVE IT, FROM PEOPLE AND INSTITUTIONS THAT ARE FUCKED UP!
 
You might love them. You might respect them. You might aspire to acquiring something they have one day. But guess what?
 
They can also be FUCKED UP.
 
And fucked up people, places, things, social and cultural mandates will NEVER be able to give you the permission and validation you seek.
 
Only YOU can do that.
 
Today’s guided meditation is going to help you do two things.
 
1. Locate wherever this guilt and shame is residing your body.
2. Kick it out, and replace it with a willingness to receive your BIRTHRIGHT.
 
I pray I am not alone in my sentiment on this.
 
Please leave your comments on what comes up for you below. I would love to read it!!!!

 

JOIN OUR PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP FOR THERAPISTS AND HEALERS READY TO STEP INTO THEIR SPIRITUAL AND FINANCIAL SOVEREIGNTY!

JOIN HERE: https://www.facebook.com/groups/362755377474811/

Warmest regards,

Briana MacWilliam

TheAbundantHealer.net
CreativeArtsTherapiesOnline.com
BrianaMacWilliam.com

7 Key Questions to Call in Soul Clients

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My Darling Subscriber,
Wow!

We had a great training on Sunday on how to use Facebook Ads to start calling in ideal clients FAST.

Here are some of the goals participants of the training would like to achieve…

  • Abundance!
  • Financial freedom
  • Freedom to travel more!
  • Expansion of thought/purpose
  • To feel confident and not second guess myself
  • Relief from stress of finances and professional growth

And this training taps into a way to help you get there, without compromising your integrity as a therapist, or having to confront that icky sticky feeling of charging more for your services.

When you are exercising your creativity using alternative outlets–specifically, putting yourself out there online–you start to bring in alternative streams of revenue that relieve the pressure of trying to survive on a 1:1 business model.

In this presentation, we touched upon 7 Key Questions to help you hone in on what your clients need and want, and HOW TO WRITE YOUR MARKETING COPY so that it cuts through the noise and sings straight to your soul clients.

When we touched on this topic, one live participant responded…

“OMG, you’ve nailed the core issue- shame about selling…”

And that issue is SO pervasive among therapists and healers: associating worthiness issues and valuing the self with selling–and selling, with shame.

By the end of the training, it seemed we had tapped into something special, and I invited participants to book consultation calls with me.

We were lucky enough to have some individuals who’d previously had consultations with me on the call, and they had lovely things to say to the other attendees…

“My free consultation was amazing! I can look back at it to refresh my memory and keep me motivated!”

“The consultation helped me clarify that I am worth it!! I highly recommend  taking this first small step….”

“Do it! You’ll be sooooo happy you did, it’s FUN! Cartwheels!”

Based on this feedback I wanted to share this particular segment with you, it goes over these crucial 7 questions, if you want to write good marketing copy.

If you like what you see, I encourage you to take the full training HERE.

If you do decide to attend the training, you’ll receive a special offer on the full crash course.

And if you would like to learn more about THE ABUNDANT HEALER: 90 DAYS TO SKYROCKET YOUR CAREER program, or book a FREE consultation, go here.

I am sure we’ll be chatting soon!

Warmest regards,

Briana MacWilliam

TheAbundantHealer.net
CreativeArtsTherapiesOnline.com
BrianaMacWilliam.com

Abundance Rituals and the Power of Habit

Screen Shot 2017-11-28 at 2.31.46 PM.pngDearest Subscriber,

Aristotle said…

We are what we repeatedly do. Success is not an action but a habit.

Today, as we rev up for the new enrollment period for my signature program…

THE ABUNDANT HEALER: 90 DAYS TO SKYROCKET YOUR CAREER…

which is from December 1st to January 3rd, I would like to share some of my habitual, abundance rituals with you.

Beware, they’re a little artsy fartsy!

What successful habits do you employ? Let me know in the comments below.

And be sure you get in my PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP.

Here, you’ll be kept abreast of the following AMAZING free trainings this month…

Enrollment EVENT

And if you’re ready to jump on it, go ahead and sign up for our first FREE TRAINING, here.

This period we are kicking it off with FB ads!

As a therapist and healer, what if I could teach you—in only 90 Minutes— how to create and launch 1 successful Facebook Traffic Ad, that would be IRRESISTIBLE to SOUL CLIENTS, attracting hundreds of potential clients, for only $5 a day–would you be interested?

In this FREE training you will learn one simple marketing strategy, implementing one Facebook traffic ad, to start driving potential clients to your business FAST.

This involves three simple steps, which we will cover in detail in the training…

1. The benefits of building a private Facebook group and community.

2. How to write masterful marketing copy that cuts through the noise and sings straight to your soul clients.

3. How to launch one successful Facebook traffic ad using audience targeting and spending no more than $5 per day.

So make sure you sign up today!

Register Here: https://events.genndi.com/reg…/169105139238456693/5d0b63c607

See you around!

Warmest regards,

Briana MacWilliam ATR-BC, LCAT
CreativeArtsTherapiesOnline.com
BrianaMacWilliam.com

TheAbundantHealer.net